Mind

Be Inspired Featured Mind

Embrace yourself wholeheartedly

Emotional baggage; we all got it and kind off hate it. Sandra Aggemo on the other hand sees it as a gift and embraces it wholeheartedly. Why? Because she believes that is what makes a person unique.
By: Henriette Danielsen

I met Sandra for the first-time years ago in a small town in Sweden where she was studying Business and Finance. When our paths crossed again a few years later in Stockholm, she had quit her job to pursue her dream of working as a fulltime Life Coach. This awoke my curiosity!

Her whole adult life Sandra has been running from the feeling of not being good enough, even though everyone around her always spoke so highly of her.
– People have always said that I should be happy and proud; “You are such a talent, you have this and that… You have good education, good job, friends”. I could hear them, but I really couldn’t feel what they told me to feel. It was like something was missing, she explains.

Nevertheless, she is thankful for this, because it led her into areas like KBT and ACT (cognitive- behavioral therapy); reading all kinds of books, meeting therapists, doing yoga and meditation, talking to friends about it and finally, finding her path in life and become a certified Life Coach.

– I wanted to use all my emotional baggage to better understand me and my surroundings. To be a Life Coach, for me, is an approach to life itself; curiosity, openness, warm meetings and vulnerability.

But what does a Life Coach do exactly?
– A Life Coach will help you dig underneath the thoughts and feelings of “what if’s”, help you realize what’s important to you and explore those inner voices. Which one is the terrified and playing-it-safe inner-critic and which one is your bedazzling inner intuitive voice? As a coach, I help you clarify and sort it all out. During the coaching-session you are encouraged to find your own answers, your own truth. I have the questions, you have the answers. As a Life Coach, I act as an objective warm hearted friend, support, encourage and challenge you.

Sandra has always loved that spark in someone else’s eye when they realize something about themselves or their life that can help them overcome their fear and find their path.
– I have always wondered what people run from. We are in such a high pace all the time. Why? It’s like we need to finish a race, but the finish line is being moved forward all the time. We sweat and forget to recharge at the water station. One of my answers are that we are running from ourselves, our longings, our feelings.

As a Life Coach, I have the magical opportunity to meet people at the “water station” and help them recharge and/or change direction.

Sitting opposite to Sandra I sense a certain calm aura over her, but at the same time she feels playful and adventurous. She has that look in her eye!
– People often find me both humorous and deep. I truly believe that the most serious things could include laughter and the funniest things could include tears. In my company, you are very welcome to both cry and laugh, she says.

Having built up a client base both in Stockholm and other parts of the country, Sandra sees a recurring topic in her sessions.
– Many of my clients feel stuck, lost or scared of doing what they truly dream of doing. Some have high expectations on themselves and the people around them which causes a lot of disappointment and stress. Some are struggling to understand who they are or just how to be themselves. Some say they have low self-esteem. Some say they don’t know what they like to do anymore. And some clients are extremely happy and just keen on exploring themselves, she explains.

While I listen to her I nod my head, I can indeed relate to more than one of those topics. Which makes me wonder, how do we become happy?
– I believe that the way we today constantly strive for happiness and pursuing our dream is more a happiness trap than anything else. And I have been there myself, always seeking for that good feeling trying to erase the “bad feelings”, striving for that next goal that should fulfil my life.

– I’ve realized that it’s not about seeking happiness or achieving goals, it’s about finding a peaceful way of living. It’s about understanding that we are in constant change and so are our feelings. Happiness it’s not static – a goal does not last forever. I see it as highly important to understand that humans have all sorts of feelings and accept that. A life in joy is not a life without tears, fear or uncertainty – it’s the opposite, she explains.

Before we part ways, we hug goodbye. The last Sandra says to me before she leaves is:
– Maybe happiness is the same thing as self-acceptance, being in contact with the real you and not trying to change everything. Because there is nothing as beautiful as a person being in contact with themselves, without a facade and lots of filters.


Name: Sandra Aggemo
Age: 28
Lives: Enskede, Sweden
One thing that makes me smile: People dancing – being captured in the power of now and the music.

If you want to learn more about Sandra Aggemo and her services you can check out her website and follow her Instagram account.

Be Inspired Mind

Letter to myself

Dear myself, when everything you know crumbles, and falls apart. When you think this is the end, that you will not survive this because you just don’t know how, one thing will happen: you will survive.

Because whether you like it or not, whether you want to hear it or not (and trust me, I don’t) life will go on. You will put one foot in front of the other. Maybe you will stumble at first, but you will move forward. Even if it is at such a slow pace that it’s not visible to the naked eye. Because it’s not a choice. It does not matter how evolved we have convinced ourselves we were, we are animals and for thousands of years it has been fixed in our genes that we need to keep on going, find food, shelter and survive.

Don’t get me wrong. You won’t be happy. It will be tough and you will maybe even wonder what the point of all this is. I cannot believe I am quoting that movie but hear me out. In “Sex Tape” with Cameron Diaz and Jason Segel, Segel drives his kids to school and his young daughter in the back seat out of nowhere drops some pretty amazing insight: “Why do we keep having all these days and then going to bed at night and then having all these days and then going to bed at night?” Segel answers: “That’s sort of what life is” And her to respond: “But when will it end?” That is a pretty good sum up of how you feel right now. Which is crazy because three or four months back you felt you had your whole life figured out, a purpose, a goal, a raison d’être. You had your struggles, but everything was under control.

You like to think everything happens for a reason, but right now, you wonder what that reason might be!

Today you are not happy. But you put one foot in front of the other, and maybe you will take two steps back tonight when it gets dark and the aftershock of the heart quake that your life suffered will keep coming as you replay everything in your head and in your heart. But as sure as the sun will come up, you will too. And you will eventually find a purpose again, and maybe your hopes and dreams will be fulfilled. Or maybe you need new hopes and dreams, or maybe you just need to change your perspective.

There is only one way to find out: It’s to keep having all those days and going to bed at night.


By: Mo Oléron

Be Inspired Mind

15 motivational quotes to get you through the tough days

We all have those days where it just feels impossible to get anything done.

When you’re feeling low, unmotivated or discouraged, come back to these quotes to inspire you to look forward and get back to working.

I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence but it comes from within. It was there all the time.
– Anna Freud

Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.
– Martin Luther King Jr.

Success is not permanent, and failure is not fatal.
– Mike Ditka

It’s difficult to follow your dreams, but it’s a tragedy not to.
– Unknown

Raise your words, not your voice. It’s rain that grows flowers, not thunder.
– Unknown

Draw a map, find a path, take a breath, and run!
– Unknown

By being yourself, you put something wonderful into the world that was not there before.
– Edwin Elliott

Things turn out best for people who make the best of the way things turn out.
– John Wooden

It’s hard to fail, but it is worse to never have tried to succeed.
– Theodore Roosevelt

You must expect great things of yourself before you can do them.
– Michael Jordan

The ones who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones that do.
– Anonymous

Don’t be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.
– John D. Rockefeller

We become what we think about most of the time, and that’s the strangest secret.
– Earl Nightingale

The road to success and the road to failure are almost exactly the same.
– Colin R. Davis

You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.
– Steve Jobs

Have a favorite motivational quote that you don’t see here? Let us know in the comments below what quote helps you get through the tough days.


By: Samantha Thayer

Be Inspired Mind

Irrational fears: when lucky charms turn into OCD

When irrational fears take over your sanity. Welcome to my world. 

I have always feared flying. While writing this I am sitting on a plane to Paris so obviously, the fear never stopped me from traveling, but it´s still always there. Somehow, I convinced myself that to survive a flight I have to follow a set of rituals involving a necklace I always have on, touching the plane from the outside as we board, and, probably the most time consuming and socially awkward when traveling with people, counting in my head from take off until the seatbelt sign is off.  If anyone from a mental institution is reading this, they are probably on their way to get me right now with a giant butterfly net. (Well I’ll be in Paris!).

I can’t really explain where these rituals come from, but they are there. They have been there for as long as I can remember and clearly, it has always “worked”. And spare me the whole “planes are safer than cars” speech, I’ve heard it many times before. I have also noticed that the bigger the plane the more scared I am, which makes absolutely no sense. Ok, I was terrified and praying for my life in the 10 seats Tara Air flight from Lukla to Kathmandu, but in my defence it’s the most dangerous airline in the world, I am pretty sure everyone peed their trekking pants. But in general, the bigger the plane, the more worried I am.

I am also afraid of very large cruise ships coming into port. Don’t even ask me why and how. I have no problem getting on them, but seeing them from afar makes me very uncomfortable. Then there is the whole hypochondriac issue when each little pain is Googled, each mosquito bite is dengue fever or malaria while traveling in Asia, each little cut can turn into gangrene and each headache into brain tumour.

How do I get anything done you ask? It’s a constant inner struggle between this part of me who’s afraid of everything and the part of me who’s rationalising and relying to facts and common sense. It´s the second part that wants to be able to explore, discover and try new things and thank God, it´s most of the time the part of me that wins, even though the fear is always there lurking in the shadows.

However, lately I started to get tired of this constant struggle between rational and irrational thoughts. I want to be stronger than this. Because I am a sane (yes yes) 31-year-old who is in control of her life (mostly) and because fear does not prevent danger from happening.

Today I did not count during take-off and until the seatbelt sign was switched off. And since you can read this, I made it there alive! First step towards OCD freedom.


By: Morgane Oléron

Be Inspired Mind

I changed the rules

For years, I’ve been living by the rules. Or what I thought were the rules. Turns out I was interpreting them all wrong.

Be nice: let others walk all over you.
Be respectful: do not utter your own opinion.
Be humble: stay within your comfort zone.
Be polite: do not stand up for yourself and constantly apologize.

Let’s say I have built up a fair amount of frustration over the years, until I realized what a waste of time and energy it was trying to please everyone. But it’s one thing to recognize it, and admit it. It´s a whole different thing to actually act on it. You can repeat to yourself that life is short, you can buy postcards with empowering quotes, but when you find yourself facing challenging situations, habits die hard.

When I turned 30 I told myself (I even wrote it down) that this year would be the one I do what makes me truly happy. 6+ months in the year it’s time for a check-up:

While my changes are neither “drastic” nor spectacular, I am proud. I stood up for myself on several occasions. In my own way, but I did. What I am probably most proud of however, is getting out of my comfort zone. I gathered the courage to tell people I liked what they were doing/wearing/standing for. I reached out to them and told them I felt the same way and that I had dreams and skills in spades. I shut up the little voice in my head saying “who do you think you are? Why would people care? You really think one else thought of that before you?!”.

And what happened? People reached back. People wanted to meet and brainstorm. In six months, I made more new friends and interesting contacts than I had in years, people who took me to where I am today.  And the best part: it brought me to the beautiful adventure that Best of You is.

My rules haven’t changed, but they now have a whole new meaning:
Be nice: take care of yourself to be able to care for others.
Be respectful: always hear others out before letting them hear your voice.
Be humble: share successes, admit and learn from failures.
Be polite: never stop smiling.

Habits die hard. Key word being: die. Like everything else in life, with practice come progress.


By: Morgane Oleron

General Mind

The fear, the addiction and the letting go

We fear, we are addicted and eventually we let go.

We fear other’s scrutinizing looks and we fear failure.
We are addicted to things that slow us down and disperse our energy and focus. We are addicted to people’s opinions and social recognition.
We are letting go of hopes and dreams because we convince ourselves, or let others convince us ,that we are not good enough.

When…

What we really should fear is to not to act. To not try and to stay put; until it is too late. If your fear is too strong, remember what Will Smith’s character says in After Earth: “Fear is not real. The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist. That is near insanity. Do not misunderstand me danger is very real but fear is a choice”.

What we really should be addicted to is to make ourselves happy and healthy. We should focus on ourselves and be chasing our own hero, just like Matthew McConaughey says it in his acceptance speech for his Oscar for Dallas Buyers Club“When I was 15 years old, I had a very important person in my life come to me and say, “Who’s your hero?” And I said, “I don’t know, I’ve got to think about that. Give me a couple of weeks.” I come back two weeks later, this person comes up and says, “Who’s your hero?” I said, “I thought about it. It’s me in 10 years.” So I turned 25. Ten years later, that same person comes to me and says, “So, are you a hero?” And I was like, “Not even close! No, no no!” She said, “Why?” I said, “Because my hero’s me at 35.” So you see every day, every week, every month and every year of my life, my hero’s always 10 years away. I’m never gonna be my hero. I’m not gonna attain that. I know I’m not, and that’s just fine with me because that keeps me with somebody to keep on chasing”

What we really should be letting go of is the negativity. Just as David Lynch puts it: “Negativity is the enemy of creativity”.


By: Morgane Oleron /Photo cred 

Mind

Just breathe

Had a rough Monday? Feel like your mind is racing and you can´t find any inner peace? Something as simple as focusing on your breath for a few minutes can do the trick to get you back on track.

Health is often combined with what we eat and how we choose to stay active, and we all know that without food we won’t last long, and without moving our body it will weaken and feel drained of energy. But we rarely focus on something so essential as our breath. By simply focusing on our breathing a few minutes every day; you can promote mental focus and relax your body.

But what is conscious breathing? What does that even mean? According to the internet and our friend Google it is: “the practice of breathing with awareness, intention and attention to your inner experience, in the present moment”.

And how can conscious breathing help us?  It can help you slow down your mind and find inner peace, help you sleep better, reduce anxiety and fear, help you become more creative and simple give you a clearer and healthier mind.

Feeling sceptical? I know I was in the beginning, but then I was introduced to the 4-7-8 breath and now I practice it regularly. Usually at home, but even before I head into big meetings or whenever I feel stressed. Let’s take a closer look on how to perform that:

Sit up tall, legs crossed on a yoga mat (or on a cushion on the floor, your bed or whatever you prefer, but keep in mind it´s always best to sit with your hips higher than your knees, that will help you maintain a straight back and a better posture in general). Close your eyes and place the tip of your tongue behind your upper front teeth, and keep it there through the entire exercise. Start by exhale completely through your mouth, making a hissing sound. Then close your mouth and inhale quietly through your nose to a mental count of four. Hold your breath for a count of seven, before exhaling completely through your mouth, making a hissing sound to a count of eight.

Repeat this cycle a few times and see if it helps you regain your focus and inner peace. Let us know if you tried it and if it had an impact on you by leaving a comment in the comment field below.


By: Henriette Danielsen / Photo cred

Featured Mind

Find what feels good  

In our high pace society, we often run around doing everything at once in the hopes of checking of yet another thing on our to-do lists. We need to have it all; the perfect job, family and relationships. But the pursuit of having it all leaves us with no time or strength to take care of ourselves.

We all need a break every once in a while, for the sake of our sanity, but how do we do that?

Realize that you need it
First off you need to realize that you’re not running on super fuel and we all need to refill occasionally. Taking time for ourselves, away from the many distractions that surround us, is of the highest importance.

Find your “me-time”
Whatever makes you feel relaxed and good is considered “me-time”. It can be to go for a walk, practice yoga, take a bath, read a book, try out a new recipe etc. “Me-time” means different things to different people, you just need to find yours.

Prioritize it
Solitude is like a little vacation for the soul. It may feel like a challenge to let yourself slow down, but is still very important. Make time in your everyday to find what feels good and make it a priority.

Tell people
Be clear about your needs to the people around you. If friends want to meet, but you want to spend that time doing something for you, let them know. Or tell your partner you will spend the next hour having “me-time”. Make them understand this is a priority to you.

Don’t feel guilty
Many of us are used to putting others first and may therefore find it hard to prioritize ourselves without feeling guilty about it. Taking time for yourself is healthy, and to be able to take care of others and share your positive energy you need to nurture yourself first. Feel good to do good, and leave the guilty conscious at the door step.


By: Henriette Danielsen 

Mind

The magic of self-love

We focus on being a good friend, the perfect partner and a loving family member. What we often seem to forget or at least set second, is loving ourselves.

Practicing self-love is often associated with being selfish, but that couldn’t be further from the truth! It will not only help you become the best version of yourself, but will also help you get in touch with your wellbeing and your own happiness.

Not sure on how to practice self-love or what it even means? We give you five simple steps that may inspire you.

Bring out your smile
Each morning when you wake up we recommend you to tell yourself something positive. How lovely you look, how great you feel or compliment yourself on how you handled a situation the day before. It can be whatever, but try to start each day with a positive thought and a smile.

Learn to say no
Feeling tired and not in the mood to go for a drink? Or maybe you don’t want to hang out with a friend or do that extra work your boss kindly asks you to? Learn to say no. It’s not selfish putting yourself first.

Notice how you talk to yourself
Have you made a mistake at work? Not upheld your new year’s resolution or said something you regret? Notice how you “talk” to yourself in those situations. Do you talk yourself down? Do you focus on your weaknesses rather than your strengths? Don’t! Learn to accept yourself, shortcomings and all, and be supportive.

Listen to yourself
Feeling like taking it easy and watch a movie or read a book all by yourself? Or maybe unwind by going to yoga? Learn how to prioritize yourself and take the time you need to take care of your needs. Find what feels good, clear your mind and just appreciate doing something nice for yourself.

Find your own happiness
We often expect others to make us happy and forget that we have the power and responsibility for our own happiness. Stop seeking happiness outside of yourself, long lasting happiness comes from within. The one person you always have to live with is yourself so be able to be happy on your own.

Lastly, remember that practicing self-love does not mean you’re being selfish. It simply means you love yourself enough to take care of yourself, creating your own happiness. You cannot make others happy if you’re not happy yourself first.


By: Henriette Danielsen

Be Inspired Mind

Power quotes to get you through the week

Finding yourself in a little mid-week slump? Lacking energy or the mood to even care? Worry not, we have gathered a few quotes as a reminder to boosts your spirits and get you through whatever your facing.

“You don’t have to be a genius or a visionary or even a college graduate to be successful. You just need a framework and a dream”
– Michael Dell, founder of Dell

“It always seems impossible until it’s done”
– Nelson Mandela

“Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same”
– Carlos Castaneda

“No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world”
– Robin Williams

“Your critics do not count. Their words will fade. You won’t”
– Justin Timberlake

“There are so many great things in life; why dwell on negativity”
– Zendaya

“Life sometimes brings enormous difficulties and challenges that seem just too hard to bear. But bear them you can, and bear them you will, and your life can have a purpose”
– Barbara Walters

“If you think you’re too small to have an impact, try going to bed with a mosquito”
– Anita Roddick, founder of The Body Shop

So, turn that frown upside down and go concur the world <3


By: Henriette Danielsen