Surely you have called or heared somebody be called a perfectionist? This is often taken as a compliment, but in the tendency of perfectionism actually hides insecurity, shame and negative self-image.
Perfectionism is the unrealistic aspiration of a person to be perfect, especially in those aspects of life that are important to him or her. Such a person is chronically burdened by his/hers behaviours.
Perfectionists are never satisfied with themselves, no matter how much success he or she has achieved and how many compliments they may have received. Despite all the efforts and good results, they strive for more. Perfectionists aren’t suitable for team work either, since they don’t trust anyone and always doubt others competence, always convinced that only they can do the work properly.
Nobody is perfect! That’s the truth we all know so well.
At the core of perfectionism there is an attempt by a person who tries to compensate the negative image of themselves. With a thought of being worth enough if only they achieve whatever goal they have set. Unfortunately, no matter how successful and good a perfectionist might be, he or she will never feel better because of just that.
So, what can you do? First of all, perfectionists don’t want to change this tendency, so its important to work towards strengthening the positive self image and accepting and overcoming shame. Working on these aspects helps a person to get rid of the need to do everything perfectly.
Nobody is perfect! That’s the truth we all know so well. And, of course, it’s okay to try to be good at everything we do, but not always strive for perfection when we all know that it does not exist. Do your best and that is more than good enough.
By: Sonja Josipovic