Do you sometimes feel overwhelmed trying to do everything for everyone? Pleasing everyone but yourself? You might just have what is called the disease to please.
Disease to please has been around for a very long time and girls are especially prone to it. The symptoms include: taking upon yourself to do everything, trying to help everyone, worrying about what others think of you, stressing about not being able to deliver, neglecting yourself and your desires. The list goes on, and most of us have probably experienced this before, losing sight of our own self while trying to please everyone else.
While it is great to be able to help people and take care of them when needed, disease to please is different. Pleasing others makes us feel good, but it’s often driven only by that reason – feeling good about ourselves. And we are suckers for that feeling as our brains are wired that way. But, when pleasing others and prioritizing them makes us neglect ourselves, even the good feeling wears off.
What I’ve had to learn is that prioritising me doesn’t make me selfish.
Having boundaries and saying no doesn’t make me a bad person. If I don’t take care of me, how will I ever be able to care for others? Have can I be the best version of me if I’m always tired from pleasing everyone else? The answer is – I can’t.
If you want to be truly present and to be there for the people you love and the things that really matter to you in life then you must let go of the idea of pleasing everyone. Once you do, you will have much more time to focus on what matters and to find happiness and validation from within and not from the others.
By: Ivona Josipovic / Photo cred: Unsplash